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What is trauma?

Trauma can happen after stressful and upsetting experiences. It could be:

  • Domestic and family violence
  • Any other kind of violence or abuse
  • An accident
  • A medical procedure, like surgery
  • Any other experience that upsets you a lot.

If someone is attacked and gets an injury that leads to disability, they may experience trauma. They may struggle to adjust. It is a good idea to get support.

Trauma can affect:

  • Your body
  • Your feelings
  • Your thoughts.

These symptoms sometimes last for a long time.

You don't have to be defined by trauma. We all can heal and grow after traumatic experiences. Life can be good again.

What are triggers?

Triggers are things that remind you of the bad experience that you had. They are different for everyone. It could be:

  • Seeing the person who hurt you, like an ex-partner or support worker.
  • A song on the radio that reminds you of the abuse.
  • A smell or a sound.
  • Hearing someone else's story of abuse.
  • Anything else that reminds you of your trauma.

When you experience a trigger, you might find that:

  • Your heart beats faster
  • You feel sweaty or hot
  • You feel anxious, stressed or overwhelmed
  • You feel like the traumatic event is happening again, or you feel the same way as you did then, even though it's not happening now.

You have these responses because your body links the trigger with danger. It floods your system with hormones like adrenaline in an effort to protect you. The reaction is often called 'fight or flight'.

What is the fight or flight response?

When we are in fight or flight, our bodies prepare to respond to a dangerous situation, just like they would have thousands of years ago if we were facing a wild animal that wanted to eat us. In this state, we might:

  • Fight the source of danger.
  • Take flight and run away.
  • Freeze so we don't attract attention. 
  • Fawn over the source of danger, which means trying to win it over by being lovely and kind.
  • Flop, or shut down and play dead.

These are normal responses to trauma, though not everyone will experience all of these symptoms.

Some people have symptoms only at the time of the trauma. For others, the symptoms persist long after the actual violence or abuse has passed. However, it is always possible to heal and feel better over time.

How you can feel better after trauma

Understand that you are not broken. Your body is doing what it can to protect you but has become overly sensitive to danger. It's like a fire alarm going off when a birthday candle is lit or a car alarm going off when the car is touched gently. Your body has to relearn when to react and when to stay calm.  

Working with a trauma-informed therapist or a counsellor is a great place to start. You can find out about different types of counselling on the Neve page Counselling and therapy (internal link).

You could also try to:

  • Ground yourself by paying attention to where you are right now. When you start to feel stressed, list:
    • 5 things you can see
    • 4 things you can feel
    • 3 things you can hear
    • 2 things you can smell
    • 1 thing you can taste.
  • Breathe slowly and steadily. Count to 4 as you breathe in and 6 as you breathe out.
  • Spend time in nature.
  • Meditate.

You can find grounding exercises and meditations in the Neve section Calm space (internal link).   

It takes time and effort to feel like yourself again. You may need support but recovery is possible.  

1800 RESPECT

If you experience violence or abuse you can contact 1800 RESPECT for support and counselling.
Call 1800 737 732 or go to the 1800 RESPECT website to chat with someone online (external link).

‍To contact 1800RESPECT via SMS, text ‘HELLO’ or any greeting to 0458 737 732 to start the conversation.

Becoming safer

This section aims to help you see more clearly the difficult parts of life, including any violence and abuse you may experience. It shares tools to increase your safety inside a relationship that is violent or abusive. It talks about making plans for a safer future. It considers how disability, sexuality and gender diversity can impact experiences of violence.

Find out more

Getting help to be safe from violence and abuse

Somewhere safe to stay. Money to change the locks on your house. A kind and caring listener. Whatever your needs, if you're experiencing violence and abuse, support is available. People with disability may face extra barriers; accessible and disability-focused services can help. Here, we share resources to help you build a safer, healthier life.

Find out more

Resources.

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Disability Australia Hub

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Healing after violence and abuse

Experiencing violence and abuse can affect your ability to live a satisfying life. It can make you feel scared and unsafe. You might often think about what happened. It means you've experienced trauma. With the proper support, you can heal. Here, you can learn how trauma affects you. You can learn how to recover.

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